I’m a 10 years plus full-time carer for my husband with dementia.
I keep him calm and happy, only asking him to do what he is capable of. Music starts before he gets out of bed and follows him through the day. He often sings along.
Routine is very important. Mornings are demanding, so appointments, support workers and visitors are banned until after 11am. As his needs change, routines have to change too, and I’ve learned not to blame myself when something doesn’t work straight away.
I’ve reorganised my home to suit our needs. The open-plan area is the lounge and our bedroom, with a divider between the two. Bedrooms are too small to manoeuvre equipment. I’m now turning our dining room into a ‘snug room’ with a bed and things I enjoy. While his support worker is here, I can retreat and recharge after a sleepless night.
Moving to an over-50s lifestyle village was a great move. The community is friendly and accepting, and my husband loves the social interaction.
Finally, if your provider no longer meets your changing needs, change providers. If the support isn’t working, it will only make things harder for you.